Passages

“If there's a book that you want to read, but it hasn't been written yet,
then you must write it."

~ Toni Morrison

This quote is geared toward writers (and I like the inspiring encouragement it offers), but I also feel like the sentiment of it could work for any creative or business arena. If there's something out there that you need or want to see but it's not been created yet, if you have the ability, means and desire to create it yourself or with someone who can help you build it, go for it.

Why not?

:)

After graduating from college, I wanted to start making regular posts again. I was excited at the thought of extra time in my evenings where I might be able to do other things, like write. I couldn't wait for the day to arrive when I could jump back in.

You know... it's tougher than I thought. To jump back in.

Writing's something that comes naturally to me, much more than, say, public speaking (no, thank you). I thought I'd fall back into writing immediately, no problem. So much to say, so many stories to tackle.

But I just feel so disconnected. Not just to LiveJournal, but to everything.

Maybe it's a side effect of going back to school. I spent the past 3 1/2 years in the mindset of "keep your head down and get it all done." There was a ton of work and homework and late nights, some stress, some fun and enjoyment, but mainly just a lot of deep focus.

I spent so much time shoving everything else to the side. Writing, singing, going to the movies, spending time with friends, spending time with family (outside of the holidays, I mean), taking care of myself and my health, you name it, I put it on the backburner. That mentality got so deeply ingrained, I feel like I don't know how to let go of it. Like someone who goes undercover for a couple years and when the final bust goes down, what are they supposed to do next? How are they supposed to let go of the persona they've been playing for two years? How do they get back into their own headspace?

I haven't figured out how to do that yet.

It feels like I have all these ideas about what I'd like to do with my time, but I'm so used to telling myself, "No, there's no time for that right now, wait until after school is done." It's gotten so that I don't know how to rev myself up to dive in and tackle some of these ideas.

I figure the thing is to just do it, just open a book or read through old story notes or join a group, anything to get involved again. No pressure or schedule about it, just see what energy stirs up and where my thoughts and ideas take me. See what I find myself getting passionate about enough to make the time for it.

But it's more challenging than I thought. I find myself feeling a bit aimless, like I know there's something out there I should be doing but I haven't gotten to it yet. Maybe it's a side effect of this extra-long-and-lingering winter we seem to be having this year. Maybe it's a sign that I need a change of venue, something outside of Wisconsin and Illinois, someplace new to invigorate my senses again. I wish I knew what I needed.

I feel like I'm trying to figure it out.

In the meantime, I did say I'd try to post messages with a more positive slant to them, so here's one:

Happiness is... the kindness of a stranger.

Today I stopped at the grocery store for a few items, and while I was bagging some onions, my scarf got caught on the edge of the bin and knocked a few onions off the stand, sending them rolling across the floor. I made some sort of noise of surprise and mild annoyance, and bent down to pick up the small mess. Another customer walking by joked about how that's happened to her too and very kindly helped me retrieve the runaway onions from the floor.

It's so silly, because it's such a simple moment. But more and more it seems people get caught up in their own worlds (see above commentary about my own 'stuck' life right now, LOL) and they stop paying attention to one another out there in the day-to-day environment. That woman could have walked right on by with her cart and left me to take care of the issue myself. It was only about 2 or 3 onions, no big deal, really. I was perfectly capable of dealing with it, but instead she took time to help me out. In doing so, her friendly remarks and generosity in the moment really stuck with me the rest of this day.

So, thank you, Kind Stranger. You brightened my day. I hope someone does the same for you.

I was just reading a piece of fanfic someone had posted online, and came across a wacky, misspelled word that made me laugh out loud.

The character was trying to regain his composure.

However... the author accidentally misspelled that word, and ended up saying the character was trying to regain his composer.

Which seems completely wrong. Then again, it was a Glee fanfic, which is all about glee club and singing and choir and performance, so maybe the character really was trying to regain a composer.

Heeeeeeeeeeee.

That's almost as chuckle-worthy as whenever I see this error: "She just couldn't bare it anymore."

I have no idea why, but apparently there are lots of characters out there who have trouble with nudity.

;)

Thankfully, neither of those errors are as cringe-worthy as this one: "He put his arms around her waste."

Please, for the love of everything Shakespeare, it's W-A-I-S-T. WAIST! NOT WASTE! Unless you really mean for your character to be holding someone else's, well... you get the pitcher. I mean, PICTURE!

*GRIN*

"Procrastinator... That's what you are..."

I need to complete my "take home" final exam for my 'Concepts of New Media' course this weekend. There are 6 essay questions, and I need to write thorough answers to them. I should finish it tonight, if at all possible.

*whines* But I don't want to!

I'm tired, and tonight I just don't feel like doing it.

I'm in a mental tug of war between what I should do and what I want to do. HELLLLLLLP.

EDITED TO ADD: 3 essay questions down, 3 to go! Whew. I'm trying here.
EDITED AGAIN TO ADD: Now 4 essay questions down, 2 to go. But I think I'm going to stop for the night because my brain is slowing down and I'm tired. I want to unwind a bit. I will finish the final 2 questions tomorrow. Thanks for letting me vent to you all in the meantime! *GRIN*

Tonight I have to finish writing a major paper for a class.

I just keep stalling. I've read through what I've already written, I've reorganized my notes, I keep double-checking my email. I just can't seem to get the energy going to finish this damn paper once and for all.

*cue ridiculous whining*

I don't want to!!!

Okay, I swear I'll focus and get it done now. Thank you for letting me rant and whine and avoid my homework for a moment or two.

;)

*heavy dramatic sigh* I think I'm getting a little burnt out when it comes to school.

This is a much belated post, and for that I should be flogged.

(I've been watching Merlin, so please forgive the medieval reference. Hee.)

Anyway, to explain: back in August, I responded to readthesubtext's personal LJ when she asked her friends-list members to give her some 'top five' questions. In retribution for all the torturous questions I gave her to answer, she came back and gave me the same treatment when I posted the meme to my LJ. (And I love you for it, Gemma. *GRIN*) I answered everyone else's offerings first because they seemed easier, but then I got sick of reading my own voice on the page so I decided to take a break from answering before diving head-first into Gem's marvelously lengthy list.

Now I'm back. (Everybody run!)

She gave me fourteen top five questions, so I'm going to break up my responses into three posts in order to keep them from getting enormously unwieldy (well, as much as I can, given that I am a wordy, wieldy sort). I will also put my answers behind a cut, so as not to break your f-list pages.

Okay, let's have some fun! On to the Top 5!


( Top Five Favourite Ways To Pass The Time )


( Top Five Songs That Make You Smile... )


( Top Five Scenes That Make You Laugh... )


( Top Five Books... )


( Top Five Pet Peeves )


Annnnd that's it for now!

I'll be back soon with such madness as "Top Five Films That Had A Lasting Impact On You" and "Top Five People You'd Like To Smack Upside The Head." *laughs uproariously*

Thanks again for playing along! (Especially Gemma, my hilarious taskmaster. *wink*) I hope you're finding these entertaining thus far.

:)

Because I was feeling whimsical last week, I agreed to take part in the "Top Five" meme (as mentioned in this LJ entry).

I'm still working on one person's lengthy list o' questions *cough*readthesubtext*cough* but I'll be posting the three others' requests in subsequent posts tonight (or tomorrow morning, because it's getting verrrrry late). This is the first of those three.

There were some tough choices to make, and I'm certain I forgot some things that would have made for even better answers. I'll probably think of those possibilities months from now and Gibbs-slap myself.

(By the way, that's an NCIS reference, for those who may not know. Agent Gibbs often slaps his subordinates on the backs of their heads when they're being obnoxious or overly stupid. He once even slapped himself, when he really messed up. Heh.)

Okay, on to the Top 5!

This post is for the lovely callieach.


( Top Five Ensemble Showtunes )


( Top Five Celebrities You'd Like To Meet )


And finally...

( Top Five Ways You Like To Wear Your Hair )


And that's it for part 1! Hope you liked my answers. Thanks for playing along, Callie! :)

I'm not sure I've ever responded to a meme before, here on LJ. However, this one, as mentioned by the lovely and talented lostakasha, seemed potentially fun and enlightening.

Simply list the first lines of each story you've written.

(Edited comment. Or, apparently it's this: Post the first lines from your 25 most recent stories. Do you notice any patterns?)

I've found it's interesting to see the variety of approaches people take when starting off their stories. Does that first line grab the reader immediately? Make you think? Make you pause? Make you laugh? Make you want to read more?

I'm not sure mine are anything particularly earth-shattering in any of those categories, but it was a cool exercise to dig them up and see how I began each piece. I liked the one that began with dialogue, and I was especially amused by the one that started with just one word.

Anyway, my 'first lines' list is short and sweet, because I haven't written that many stories. Which gives me another nudge to make more time for it!

( The beginning is everything... )


Ironically, the story I happen to think contains some of my best writing (Scenes From Hell) seems to have the most bland opening. In my defense, that line has a purpose. But one hopes you'll see that when I finish editing the beast and post it here at long last.

Regardless, it's an intriguing exercise, isn't it? Makes me wonder how some of my favorite authors measure up, with their published novels and opening lines. Hmm.

So, all you fabulous writers out there, what are some of your first lines? :)



Quick P.S. to bardsmaid, who is lovely and talented in her own right: if you get the chance to try this, I think your 'first lines' list would be fascinating! Can you imagine? Makes me want to go to your Web site right now and start looking at all the different ways you started your wonderful stories. I may go do that. *GRIN*

Another quick P.S., this time to lostakasha: After reading your post with all your AtS listings, this morning out of curiosity I glanced through some of your Bones fic opening lines. Gorgeous stuff. I think my favorite is from The Kindness of Strangers: "As a child, I was work." Simple and straight to the point. Immediately makes me want to know more about this narrator, and why he thinks he was so much 'work.' Was he truly a challenge? Or did his mother or father make him feel that way? And what is he like today? There are other first lines of yours that I really like too, but that one was the most immediately thought-provoking. (Though I do think that the opening line to Lilly and the Jack of Hearts has one of the prettiest images, with those drifting cherry blossoms. Lovely.)